Have you ever packed 40 adults (to say nothing of assorted packages, children, and a baby nicknamed Anna Banana) into a 26 passenger coaster?
You say it can’t be done?
Au contraire, my good mon. Au. Contraire.
First, keep the AC blasting while waiting for the coaster to
fill overflow. This will lull your passengers into a false sense of spaciousness (“I do not sweat, therefore I am not crowded”). It will also prevent them from bolting (back out into the heat) when the overfilling process drags on and on.
Second, if any of the passengers does complain about sharing a seat they paid good money for with one (or two) other people . . . sincerely, repeatedly, with-your-heart-in-your-eyes, BEG them to get off and wait for the next bus. They won’t, of course, and you will have very effectually quelled the unruly one. (And you can be sure that every one else will think twice about revolting.)
In fact, this technique is so effective that later on the refractory passenger will obediently serve as an intermediary between yourself and the rest, handing fares and change back and forth with nary a bleat.
Third, (and this is the most important part) turn the AC off as soon as the vehicle starts. Your passengers will begin to sweat profusely and realize just how closely acquainted they are becoming with each other, but what care you?
You can ride with the side door wide open, the wind blowing in your face, on the lookout for more. Always more.
This is your time to shine, to reach new heights of clown car-dom.
Three – better make that four – no five! – adults can be uncomfortably mashed standing in the area between the doorway and the first row of seats. They will all find the same two outcroppings on which to stake their tenuous hold on an upright state in life. This will be difficult for some, yes, nigh unto impossible for others, but the coaster must be packed!!!
And if things get really desperate, you and one of the young men can always hang out the open door.
IYG (If You Go): Catch the Port Antonio coaster on the Burger King side of the Halfway Tree Bus Terminal. Cost: $450 Jamaican. Incredibly scenic ride through the mountains and along the coast. Final destination is the Port Antonio taxi rank, which is a short walk to Queen Street (several guesthouses), the bay side restaurants, and the heart of town.